A&A Ep. 98
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Karrie: [00:00:00] Welcome to Awakened and Alive After 40.
Dominique: If you're searching for inspiring and easy to apply Enneagram and Human Design content, then you've come to the right place. We're your hosts, Dominique
Karrie: and Karrie, two friends and coaches who are passionate about sharing our knowledge and insights on these two powerful self awareness systems to help you step outside the box and into a life that is true to who you really are.
Dominique: We're so grateful to have you here. Let's jump into today's episode.
Karrie: Hello, everyone. Welcome back to the Awakened and Alive After 40 podcast. Today we want to talk about something that we've never really talked about before in these terms, and since we are a podcast for everyone, and this is going to happen to each and every one of us experiencing [00:01:00] life on earth is talking about aging and some of the things that are really important to change or cultivate in your lifestyle as you age. So we wanted to approach this topic from sort of four different angles. We wanted to talk a little bit about physical health and our physical bodies as we age, as well as our mental and cognitive state, also our emotional self and our spiritual self. So these are all things that we all have as humans, and we are all working with in our day to day lives and bring important parts to our life here on earth. As we age, we feel like there are really interesting things we can talk about that we can do to help support that process.
Dominique: Yeah. I love that because I feel like many of us are trying to age as gracefully as possible, right? I know we can often start to become fearful or [00:02:00] just really start dreading the aging process. And like you said, Karrie, yes, we are a podcast for everyone, but you know, with the name being After 40, many of you guys out there are probably going to be in that range, so it's something that we feel like is always great conversation to have because like I mentioned before, just trying to find a way to enter into the aging process more gracefully is only gonna help us out throughout life because I can see even with my own parents the whole process of the body getting older, but the mind still feeling very young has got to be so confusing. I can only imagine. And I say this to my patients that I work with in the clinic, this gotta be a frustrating place to be where your body is telling you one thing in your mind, another and not being able to meet up together. So I feel like it's also a part of not prepping [00:03:00] for the process, which is why we're bringing this conversation to everyone's attention. Especially when it comes to the physicality of it, which is an area that I work with every single day with individuals of all ages. And one thing that I have found that helps with that switchover of mindset when we get into the older years, is not focusing so much on like bodybuilding strength or what the body is looking like, how we can usually put our attention in our younger years is wanting to look good and have bigger muscles or leaner physiques, and more about mobility, Like can I get down and up from the floor without struggling? And those are things that I work on with my patients a lot. It's just switching over that mindset. I work with a lot of older athletes and they're like, yeah, no, I just can't [00:04:00] train the way I used to. My body doesn't like it. I'm recovering for weeks instead of days. And I'm like, well, that's okay. Your body has different needs right now and it's going to be probably more mobility than strength. That's a hard thing to switch over for a lot of people is that type of mindset when it comes to the physical fitness side of things.
Karrie: I think that's so true because I think for people who have a regular fitness routine starting in their 20s or 30s, they just continue doing that workout. So whether you're a runner or you lift weights or whatever it is and you just don't think, because like you said, your mind hasn't really changed yet.
Dominique: Mmm-mmm, no.
Karrie: But your body starts to, for lack of a better word, break down a bit as you age, or not have the same quickness to recovery. So doing those same high impact, high intensity type workouts is gonna be so much harder on your body than if you cultivate [00:05:00] something gentler or like you said focusing on mobility, joint mobility, balance, minor strength. Like obviously we have to keep our strength up, but you don't have to be lifting a level of weight so many people think they do to get the benefits.
Dominique: Yeah. And I've even switched over to more body weight training because I used to crush it in the gym for years, and it was great at that time, but I just became more aware of checking in with my body. And I think that's a big one right there. If we can start to cultivate a practice of simply checking in with how our body feels physically, emotionally, all of the areas that we're talking about right now, then we can have a better understanding of what we need moment to moment. And that check in process for me has been huge over the past couple of years because I found that lifting heavy did not feel good to me any longer. And I tried to push through it and be like, Oh, no, no, no, this is what [00:06:00] has always worked for me. But it's just not the case anymore because my body's needs have changed. So yoga and body weight training is what I focus on, and that's what makes me feel good. But you won't ever know what is going to work for you unless you are willing to let go of what once did work for you and realize that it's okay for things to change, and it is completely normal for your body's needs to change.
Karrie: And if you make that shift, like you said, going from a hard hitting gym workout to a yoga class or a bodyweight calisthenics class, you'll feel better. You'll feel more vibrant, more energized, because our bodies will thank us when we take care of them in that way.
Dominique: Mmm-hmm yeah, for sure. And besides the physicality, when we're kind of looking at the process of aging, something that's become really great importance for myself and people that I work [00:07:00] with is the spiritual and emotional side of things. Especially when I am looking at my older patients in the clinic and having conversations with them, I'm really curious about what their process has been when it comes to making peace with death and dying as you get closer to that. And also making peace or having acceptance for the loss of your independence, which happens for most people at some point in their lives. And this is a huge struggle for many of them, but at the same time, what I have learned from my patients is that there's a lot of surrender that comes into play because you can't stop the process. You can't not die. You can't stop the aging process that impacts independence. And so there is a lot of acceptance and surrender that needs to take place, which is not easy for most of us.
Karrie: I mean, I think surrender is [00:08:00] a life lesson we should all be learning, but yes, even more so as we age because of that inevitability that we're all going to face, which is our own death, which can be very scary for people. Making peace with that part of life brings a lot more acceptance and less fighting against the process, which will only benefit the later years in life, in my opinion.
Dominique: Yeah, absolutely. And when we think about like, okay, how do we cultivate greater acceptance for what is and what will be, and how do we surrender more to that? If we look at it through the Enneagram lens, what do you have to share on that part, Karrie?
Karrie: Knowing yourself through this framework really can help us see that false self or that quote unquote mask that we wear for most of our lives. And I think one of [00:09:00] the freeing parts about aging is feeling the relief of letting that mask go
Dominique: yeah
Karrie: because it's something that happens to so many of us as we get older that we just sort of stop caring what others think of us. We've come more into ourselves. And so if you know yourself through the Enneagram, you can just so clearly see this mask. And when you see it, and you understand it, and you recognize it, it's a lot easier to stop wearing it. For me, that has been a gift of the system and I'm not perfect with it. I'm still working through it, but really seeing ourselves through that mask and then when we let it go being able to see that higher self once we deconstruct that personality is very freeing, and I think just doing that gives a step toward that surrender of the end of life because you just feel at peace with everything.
Dominique: Yeah, that's beautiful. When I think about what age was I at when I hit that [00:10:00] stage of, I don't fucking care what anybody thinks about me right now. And I remember when I turned 40, I was like celebrating it. That was probably my favorite birthday to celebrate, because I entered into this place of I'm good. I really don't care as much as I did before about what people think. And it was such a freeing place to finally be at. And it was so incredibly different for me. And when I look at it from the Human Design lens, we go through this process of unification when we're younger, especially from like age seven into our twenties, where we're trying to be part of the tribe. We're trying to belong. We're trying to understand society and how we fit in. And then after this cycle, we enter into a stage of being more individuated. So learning more about who we are as an [00:11:00] individual and what our purpose serves the planet in this lifetime. We can look at in Human Design, something called life cycles. And I haven't really talked much about that on the podcast yet. There's a lot involved. But when we look at life cycles, what we are naturally going through, and then through the Human Design lens, we have our Saturn return, which occurs between the age of 28, 30. I like to say, this is like when shit hits the fan. If you are not on your path, if you're not living authentically, there is going to be something that occurs that disrupts where you're at in life to bring you back into focus. For me, that happened to be hospitalization because of tremendous nervous system dysregulation, and my body pretty much going haywire because I was not listening to what it was trying to tell me. I was not paying attention to my intuition and continuing [00:12:00] along the path of people pleasing and not speaking up for myself. A lot of my friends that I've spoken to in that range, the late twenties, early thirties, have had something major occur that is shocking in some way. Did you have something similar, Karrie?
Karrie: Yeah. I got diagnosed with my autoimmune disorder when I was 28.
Dominique: Yeah. These life cycles, these are phases of growth, kind of like a video game, right? You conquer one level, then you enter into a whole new level of challenge. And this happens approximately every 10 years or so. Besides the Saturn return phase, the next big phase is Uranus opposition, which occurs in the beginning of your 40s and it lasts throughout the 40s. And this is where you start to see a shift from your, if you're looking at your chart, you have south node and north node, kind of horseshoe shapes, and you're transitioning from your south node into your north node. And this is where, again, you're kind of looking at, all [00:13:00] right, these are my early lessons that I learned in my south node. Now I'm entering into a new chapter, new lessons, a new way of being in this lifetime as I enter into the north node. Disruption can also occur here if you are not on your path, if you are not living authentically. Like I mentioned, this happens every 10 years. The big, big one that a lot of people, at least in my world, in the Human Design world, that can freak out about is the Chiron return, which happens in your early 50s. So this is where kind of the rug gets pulled out from underneath you. And this is like the universe saying, look, man, we gave you all of these options and opportunities to get your shit together. If you still don't have it together, this is going to be a huge wake up call for you. So we have all these opportunities to get back on path or to be living according to our path. And that's how these life cycles work. And it goes all the way up into even your 60s, where you hit your second Saturn return, and you start to [00:14:00] enter into what calls your soul's path here. I believe that we are spirits having human experiences, not the other way around. If we pay attention to these life cycles, we can better navigate transitions throughout the aging process. And of course, that just really makes things more comfortable emotionally and spiritually. And I think it's a really powerful area to look at in the Human Design lens.
Karrie: That's all really, really interesting. I love the connection between Human Design and these astrological concepts, that a lot of times Human Design people don't talk about as much, but it can be a really powerful way to understand these different phases of your life and sort of where your strengths lie and where you need to notice your patterning.
Dominique: Yeah, absolutely. And if all of this is really confusing, which you know what, let's get [00:15:00] this real. It is. If you are not into this. If you were to simply look at your chart and look at the Saturn and Jupiter placements, and check in with those placements throughout your lifetime, then you are going to be guaranteed to follow the path that you are meant to follow because Saturn is known as the great teacher. This is what you're here to learn. It's kind of like the barbed wire fence. If you fall off your path, Saturn is going to shock you so that it gets your attention to come back on it. And then Jupiter is the blessings. So once you achieve the mission that Saturn has for you, then you're blessed by receiving rewards that Jupiter brings about. For me, what shows up in my chart is a lot of connection to my intuition, my inner knowing and correction of old behaviors and patterns that no longer serve me. This is kind of my Saturn and Jupiter, and it is an ongoing theme in my life. So these placements can bring tremendous [00:16:00] information for you to maintain that spiritual path.
Karrie: And we've talked mostly today in this episode about physical stuff, emotional and spiritual, but I just wanted to quickly hit on the mental cognitive side of things, because if any of these ideas or concepts felt out there to you or unrelatable, it might be a good idea to take a look at that and explore that because as we age, it's really important to open our mind a little bit more to things that feel a little less comfortable or a part of our bubble that we're used to living in because that mental elasticity and open to new ideas is something that helps keep our mind and our cognition working and serving us.
Dominique: Absolutely. And when it comes to other things that we can do to cultivate just greater ease and this place of surrender, I think one thing that we've talked about often is cultivating a sense [00:17:00] of play in your life, even as we get older. I noticed this, even with my grandmother in her nineties and late nineties, there was always a sense of some sort of play, whether it was crossword puzzles or some sewing, something that was creative or for fun. Especially when we look at the later years and how eventually we start losing family, loved ones, friends, what we have left is ourselves and our connection to ourselves. Play is one of those things that enriches that connection to ourselves. And also connection to nature, I feel is really crucial as well because nature is always going to be there. It is always going to be the original source that we come from, and also that source that helps to balance us out energetically, which translates into physical wellbeing, emotional, cognitive, all of the above.
Karrie: The spiritual connection, I [00:18:00] think, ultimately, probably becomes the most important connection for us to cultivate as we age because it does lead us onto that path of surrender and reduces our fear around the whole process.
Karrie: Thank you for listening to this episode. Your support is so appreciated.
Dominique: If you'd like to have a question answered about your Human Design or Enneagram type in a future episode, you can submit it through the link in the show notes. We'd love to hear from you.